The beginning of a marriage is an exciting time filled with hope and passion. It’s a fresh chapter and life feels light and everything seems within reach. But these memories can seem fleeting when you’re further into your marriage and difficult issues begin to arise. Arguments and episodes of the silent treatment can take the place of joyful trips and blissful weekends together. It can be exhausting to keep things going when you’re saddled with stress and unresolved fights. This is where marriage therapy can provide a safe haven for partners in the relationship.
Even though it’s common for one person to seek marriage counseling, the therapist works exclusively as the couple’s therapist. There is no preference or bias toward the person who brings the couple in. At Resilience Lab, we work very hard to provide a neutral environment in marriage counseling. Our goal is to make both partners feel safe and heard. Our priority is to focus on the truth and achieve your shared goals. When you begin counseling, our therapist will meet you as a couple and as individuals. This allows us to connect on your terms. We find it’s useful to give each partner their own space to openly communicate their frustrations, fears and goals for therapy. After meeting partners individually, the following sessions will be as a couple.
Our intention is neither to help you resolve or dissolve your relationship. Our primary role is to create a space for you both to identify your mutual goals and to help you achieve them step by step. The direction your relationship takes will be driven by the two of you, not by the therapist’s suggestion. The outcome of the relationship is not the goal of our sessions together. As marriage counselors, our goal is to heal the relationship itself, not drive to a specific outcome.
In marriage counseling, we will work alongside both partners to identify problematic themes and specific challenges. Some of the most common issues we see come up are infidelity, substance abuse, family crises, mental health issues, trauma, difficulties with children from previous relationships, exes and co-parenting structures. Sometimes these concerns are brought forward in the beginning by one or both partners, but other times they arise throughout the course of multiple sessions. You do not need to have an awareness of the issue(s) before beginning therapy. During sessions, we’ll also help you identify healthy and unhealthy communication patterns as we uncover what’s causing challenges in your relationship and address solutions.